I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize