I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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