i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
