So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
If that was your dad, he is hot
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
