Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
