Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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