it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
