I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize