I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Randomize
