um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
i out mim tonsoeep
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