just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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