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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
