Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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