soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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