If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Randomize
