I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
