google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
