Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
