I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
