I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Is it because I queefed?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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