The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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