how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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