what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
