would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
