Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Randomize
