Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
