Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Randomize
