No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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