used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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