She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
whose parrot is this?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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