He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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