I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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