Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Your penis caused this!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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