He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
