were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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