K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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