She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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