Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
