You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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