Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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