Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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