hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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