Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
