I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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