He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
