At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
