he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
