good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize