She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
