So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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