we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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